How Should I Discipline My Child?

As parents, we all get stressed. Day to day life is hard enough, and sometimes our children's needs and behavior can push us over the limit. Sometimes you just want to be by yourself, but your kids are always there, wanting or needing something from you. It gets frustrating, and it can make you angry, but is it fair to take out parental frustrations on our children? Are punching, slapping and cursing at our children really effective at correcting negative behavior?

I've noticed a lot of young women who use the foulest language when reprimanding their children. I even know of girls who will proudly discuss punching their five year old sons in the chest when they need correction. I know they love their kids, and think they are teaching them right from wrong, so I do my best to help them understand that this type of discipline is not the way to go. There are more effective ways of disciplining young children and punching and cursing does more harm than good.

Harsh discipline affects children's self-esteem and teaches them to use violence to get their way. Over long periods of time, children who are treated like this become fearful and depressed and many end up in trouble in school or with the law because of issues with violent behavior. Punching, slapping and cursing doesn't correct negative behavior, it actually has the opposite effect. Not only does it make your children's behavior worse, it erodes their self-esteem and confidence and can have negative affects that last into adulthood.

How you choose to discipline your children is your choice. As a parent, it is your job to teach your children right from wrong and to show them love and encouragement as they move through the stages of their lives. It doesn't mean letting them do whatever they want, or allowing them to be disrespectful, it's about correcting their behaviors with love and compassion and understanding that children are going to make mistakes. They are going to try your patience, and test boundaries. Your children are not "bad", they are young minds who need love, guidance and support even when they make mistakes.

The next time you get angry, take a deep breath and think about what you could be doing to your children. Physical wounds heal, but the damage done to the spirit can last a lifetime.

Courtney